[PokerDeath]

This was posted at another site. What do you think, bitches????

Dear valued poker player,

We are extremely sorry for our inability to process your checks. UIGEA is a pain in the bum. We would really love to tell you how much your government is restricting our ability to give you your money, but we won't. Instead, we'll give you bonus dollars and extra money even though it really wasn't our fault to begin with.

We understand that when you grew up you were taught how awesome America was and how the red white and blue was where it's at! You silly Americans were taught that your money was potent and that the Dream Team was the best assembled team ever. You high-fived your TV every time Michael Jordan dunked on Toni Kukoc and that poor little silver medalist Croatia. Now you realize that your money is worth , and your Dream Team can't win a damn game anymore.

We would really like to tell you to write to your senators and vote and make a difference, but most of you will just sit in a forum and complain and tell us how we're liars. I know you don't realize that we've changed our processing groups eighteen times over the past eighteen days. Sure, no financial institutions want to deal with us because UIGEA has made us pariahs, but we continue to find ways to try to make you happy even though you'll bitch as soon as something doesn't go your way. We're sorry you live paycheck to paycheck because your financial planning is lacking substantially. We'd tell you to get a job flipping some burgers, but we're much more professional than that. Instead, we'll apologize profusely and hope you'll satellite into the million using your poker points that we've added into your account as a result of your troubles. Just 13,500 points for a chance to win hundreds of thousands! It's a bargain!

In conclusion, we again apologize for your inability to understand the situation at hand. You should really be thanking us for not pulling out of America like Party Poker did, even though it would have been a lot easier for us to do so. Hell, that's really something to consider. Then we wouldn't have to deal with you little bitches. Anyone know what the market in Croatia is like?

Love,
Fed up Poker Site
Posted by Wein at 8:37 AM
http://chasingidiot.blogspot.com/