[Emily_Haines]

6 - ddjuric

Never saw a hand he didn’t like. If he has two connecting cards, two suited cards or two unmatched big cards he is willing to play that hand for all his money preflop. If he has 32o and in the big blind, he is taking a flop no matter what and heaven forbid he should flop a monster like bottom pair or a gut shot there is no amount you can bet to get him to fold the hand.


7 - Czu81

Here is a clown with so little game that he folds every hand patiently waiting for a big hand. Then when big hand comes what does he do? Of course he goes all in even at level 1. One wonders if maybe he got some pointers from slikec on how to play this game.


8 - footballtime

Hyper aggressive player that if he raises preflop he will bet the flop no matter what. If he has pocket 22 and the flop comes AKT all spades (with 6 players calling preflop) he is betting. He has no ability to slow down at all and often finds himself and bad spot needing miracle cards to come. When the game switches to Omaha 8 it seems like the more cards he has translates into him betting and raising even more. The betting and raising is one thing but why the calling off your entire stack when you know you need miracle cards to win?


9 - iifold

His name may say fold but this player does anything but fold. Guy should seriously consider a name change to iiraise. Almost every hand he plays he brings it in for some stupid ass raise that is 6-10x the big blind. He has A2 in Omaha it’s jam the fuk out of it preflop and hope to catch one small card on the flop so you can make another really stupid large bet. Ok it’s one thing to be aggressive but what the fuk when you have $13 left and raise $10 preflop, how the fuk do you fold to an all in?


10 – Roxxyfish

I wonder if the 30-50 sports bets a day and posts in largest font possible distract him from playing normal poker. Ok if there is a raise, a 3 bet, and an all in and action gets to you in BB with pocket 77 there is no way that that hand is any good. I wonder if this player purposely tries to lose so he can get back to the forum and start posting some more picks and “BOOMS” and pictures of falling money.

[Jeffie]

ddjuric is in my top 5 worst, played with football the last few days he is a tad aggressive idk about being the 7th worst tho..
In my opinion the handful of players who fold til they pick up monsters are the worst eberreta, deadPhish, Slikec etc.

[ballahollic2]

you must have never played with me if I am not on ur top 10 list

[mikejamm]

Spot on Emily! It's amazing how accurately you describe the playing styles of all these donks! Proves to me that you are a sharp player who knows the proper strategy for this game. The only problem is, and you and I have attested to many times here, this shitty fuk'in sbr software works in their favor. Most, if not all these clowns hit their gut shot or trips on the river, after calling or raising all in with 3, 2, os! Any reasonably intelligent player would fold or know when to get out, but not here at shit shove fest sbr poker.

It shows sbr's lack of ability to develop software geared toward a true outcome of probability, and simply levels the playing field by rewarding ridiculously stupid play! Throw in the fact that first time players who always win like paco, who doesn't know his ass from an open ended straight and newbies who seem to automatically hit AA hole cards 3 or 4 times in a row, well it doesn't take rocket science to figure what the fuk is go'in down.

It really is a shame too, you would think a web site with such a large membership would want run a poker program with some measure of fairness and integrity. But not this place, dole out just enough crumbs to keep the beggars coming back. It's a game of ass kissing (opie and tt) favorites and you and I are not on the list! Not that I give a flying fuk to dick suck my way into a pussy boy mod sheriff badge!I've given up on having any measure of game around here, as I'm sure the largest losing dick wad who's blown the most money at DSI will win this thing anyway. It's how the whole rigged shit fest works.

Great reads though man! Keep 'em coming! I'm thoroughly enjoying you exposing these donks for what they are!
Hell, I might even be one of them myself, considering my playing style against this shitty software!
I must admit, it has helped my live game play though, getting reads on the same bullshit here day in and day out, makes my ability to spot it at a live table dead on. And fuk the trolls man, you keep writing insights into stupidity on these donk machines, sbr bots, house players, and expose them for what they are!

[Kaladarus]

SBR should start paying you if they are not already. Another quality post.

[EmpireMaker]

5 worst poker players at SBR

5] slikec

Has no post flop game at all. Once we get to level 3 all hands are either all in preflop or fold. If it is folded around and he is small blind it is 100% certainty that he will go all in. Don’t be surprised to see people make calls with K and Q high against the garbage you push with. Eventually your luck may run out even on a rigged site.


4] bobbywaves

This clown is too stupid to even now that slow rolling another player is one of the worst things you can do. We can tell he sucks just by the fact that he limped in with pocket QQ UTG and luckily flopped a Q for top set. But even with a drawy board no reason to bet this hand with multiple players in the hand. It is to be check called the whole way. And dudes 70+ years old don’t need to be talking shit at the table. Dude your not kicking anyone’s ass even if you have a gun holster on your walker.


3] dankelly

Here is one guy that has not figured out that you can raise pre flop. All hands are to be played for just a call pre flop hoping for a safe flop so he can then do the 50 BB all in bet on any favorable flop. But I have to really wonder if the flop even matters when it is nearly 100% chance that he would call an all in bet with pocket 88 on an AKQ flop anyways?


2] konck, oneunder, deadphish

Three way tie here as all three of them are scared to death to play with more than a minimum buy in stack. These guys are not gamblers at all and are the reason why books have a $2 and $5 dollar minimum bets online and $50 minimum phone bets. It must have been heaven for them when poker stars and fulltilt were available in the US with those .01/.02 games. I wonder if they even bought in for minimum at play money tables.


1] stevenash

Guy is totally clueless on the felt and even more clueless in real life. When he finds himself a spare few minutes after starting 10 Obama threads and finds his way to the felt he thinks you should play every hand. Top pair shitty kicker at level 1 what the hell he is going to call that 5 bet all in thinking his hand is good. Usually bad players are rewarded here but this guy is so bad that a corrupt and rigged game cannot reward him as it would become blatantly obvious that the game was in fact rigged. Is there any wonder that he has only one poker badge a (10th place finish) when he plays nearly every day.

[EmpireMaker]

added your first five to complete this post

[PaperTrail07]

LOL...gimme a break...theyare solid players with crazy styles....most of the time they are the guy to get me--they are unpredicatbale

[PaperTrail07]

they are the random mines your gotta walk through to win one

[daneblazer]

Disappointed I didnt make the list

[borednaz]

Yeah some how I keep expecting to see my name here. It's always surprising to me to not be included.

[zwoeins]

Yeah some how I keep expecting to see my name here. It's always surprising to me to not be included.

I feel the same
perhaps we are considered in the next issue

[borednaz]

I feel the same
perhaps we are considered in the next issue

That would be about right. We're not bad enough to make the top 10 , but just about right for the 10-15/15-20 spot that no cares about much less reads. .

[k13]

Mostly spot on.

[TheMoneyShot]

This is pretty funny

I thought for sure I'd make the top 10 worse

[Czu81]

***** Hand history (v1.2) *****
Hand ID 2122028
$0 + $11 Texas Hold'em (No Limit) - 10:23:00 01.08.2012 ET
Table 'Table 33425', 10 seats max, Real money
Seat 7 is the button. Small Blind $25, Big Blind $50
Note: seat IDs range from 1 to 10
Seat 1 (playing) : borednaz, amount $3076, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 2 (playing) : emily_haines, amount $2734, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 5 (playing) : Czu81, amount $1720, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 6 (playing) : senseionline, amount $1761, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 7 (playing) : thetrinity, amount $1773, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 8 (playing) : Diesel79, amount $2403, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 9 (playing) : mikemca, amount $2510, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 10 (playing) : petriux, amount $3143, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Diesel79: Small Blind ($25)
mikemca: Big Blind ($50)
** Dealing Down Cards **
Dealt to Czu81: [Ad, Kh]
petriux: Fold. ($0)
borednaz: Fold.. ($0)
emily_haines: Call. ($50)
Czu81: Raise. ($1720)
senseionline: Fold. ($0)
thetrinity: Fold.. ($0)
Diesel79: Fold.. ($0)
mikemca: Fold.. ($0)
emily_haines: Call. ($1670)
emily_haines: Show Cards ($0)
Czu81: Show Cards ($0)
** Dealing Flop **
Community cards: [5d, Qs, Qh]
** Dealing Turn **
Community cards: [Jh]
** Dealing River **
Community cards: [5s]
** End Round **
** Evaluate **
emily_haines: Show Cards ($0)
Czu81: Show Cards ($0)
** Showdown **
Main pot $3515, Rake $0
Summary emily_haines: bet $1720, won $1758, net $38, HoleCards [7h, Ah], HiHand [two pairs, queens and fives] [Qs, Qh, 5s, 5d, Ah], won $1758 from main pot
Summary Czu81: bet $1720, won $1757, net $37, HoleCard

[Czu81]

7 - Czu81

Here is a clown with so little game that he folds every hand patiently waiting for a big hand. Then when big hand comes what does he do? Of course he goes all in even at level 1. One wonders if maybe he got some pointers from slikec on how to play this game.

U are right...

Sorry I'm not an poker expert...... I will buy a few poker books and try to learn the game..

[nomeansno]

***** Hand history (v1.2) *****
Hand ID 2122028
$0 + $11 Texas Hold'em (No Limit) - 10:23:00 01.08.2012 ET
Table 'Table 33425', 10 seats max, Real money
Seat 7 is the button. Small Blind $25, Big Blind $50
Note: seat IDs range from 1 to 10
Seat 1 (playing) : borednaz, amount $3076, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 2 (playing) : emily_haines, amount $2734, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 5 (playing) : Czu81, amount $1720, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 6 (playing) : senseionline, amount $1761, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 7 (playing) : thetrinity, amount $1773, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 8 (playing) : Diesel79, amount $2403, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 9 (playing) : mikemca, amount $2510, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Seat 10 (playing) : petriux, amount $3143, amount bet $0, penalty (None)
Diesel79: Small Blind ($25)
mikemca: Big Blind ($50)
** Dealing Down Cards **
Dealt to Czu81: [Ad, Kh]
petriux: Fold. ($0)
borednaz: Fold.. ($0)
emily_haines: Call. ($50)
Czu81: Raise. ($1720)
senseionline: Fold. ($0)
thetrinity: Fold.. ($0)
Diesel79: Fold.. ($0)
mikemca: Fold.. ($0)
emily_haines: Call. ($1670)
emily_haines: Show Cards ($0)
Czu81: Show Cards ($0)
** Dealing Flop **
Community cards: [5d, Qs, Qh]
** Dealing Turn **
Community cards: [Jh]
** Dealing River **
Community cards: [5s]
** End Round **
** Evaluate **
emily_haines: Show Cards ($0)
Czu81: Show Cards ($0)
** Showdown **
Main pot $3515, Rake $0
Summary emily_haines: bet $1720, won $1758, net $38, HoleCards [7h, Ah], HiHand [two pairs, queens and fives] [Qs, Qh, 5s, 5d, Ah], won $1758 from main pot
Summary Czu81: bet $1720, won $1757, net $37, HoleCard

lol wp emily, wonder how long u can go without including yourself in this list

[Emily_Haines]

lol wp emily, wonder how long u can go without including yourself in this list

Like I said seen this idiot move his whole stack all in 3 times in the first ten hands at level 1. Pretty sure he didn't have big hands every time he did it. Then again this is SBR poker and these shit players are constantly rewarded, so maybe he thinks this is good poker.

[Emily_Haines]

7 - Czu81

Here is a clown with so little game that he folds every hand patiently waiting for a big hand. Then when big hand comes what does he do? Of course he goes all in even at level 1. One wonders if maybe he got some pointers from slikec on how to play this game.

U are right...

Sorry I'm not an poker expert...... I will buy a few poker books and try to learn the game..

books won't help. you are that bad.

[downsouth]

Who called with a7 for 1600 plus at 25 50 blinds.

That is as awful as they come. What can you possibly beat there?

[Weems2k]

I must be neither too good, or too bad to make these lists. Which is just fine by me. Less you know, the better.

[Emily_Haines]

Who called with a7 for 1600 plus at 25 50 blinds.

That is as awful as they come. What can you possibly beat there?

I saw him ship his whole stack all in 3 times in the first 10 hands. Never played with him before and thought he was maniac just wanting to double up fast or be done. I was wrong. After playing several levels the guy patiently waited for hands and then just went all in. Obviously he had some pretty good hands early in the tournament to do this. Going all in preflop with your big hands and forcing everyone to play correctly is about as bad as it gets and why this player is high on my worst players list. Made note and won't make same mistake again.

[k13]

Add buddman77j to this list.

[stuler]

#	User	Total Points	Cashes
1	slikec	9260	51

hmmmm......

yep this guy must be the luckiest muthrfukker in the world to pull these numbers...how could he possibly have any idea how to play.

[JAKEPEAVY21]

[k13]

yep this guy must be the luckiest muthrfukker in the world to pull these numbers...how could he possibly have any idea how to play.

I don't know how some of these people even know how to turn on a fucken computer.

Boggles my mind how a functioning human being can be so stupid.

[zwoeins]

I don't know how some of these people even know how to turn on a fucken computer.

Maybe they don't know how to turn it off - so there is no need to turn it on.

[k13]

These fucken pieces of are on every fucken poker site. Can't fucken play one minute without losing a 90% hand.

Beyond fucken disgusting.

[k13]

The worse part is I go play for real money and these fucken bitches are even worse, too bad the same thing happens. Hand after fucken hand after fucken hand.

At least let me fucken bet on these fucken +1000 dogs. Fucken easiest money ever.

Oh you need a two outer with only two cards to come. Odds of that should be 98%.

[eleuropeano]

who wastes so much effort writing shit about other players. + if you know them so well and they have such clearly defined patters, it should be easy for you to beat them.