The TRUE testimony of Roger Clemons!!!!!

The Seer · 02-21-2008, 10:49 AM

Clemens: You want answers?

Congressman: I think I'm entitled to them.

Clemens: You want answers?

Congressman: I want the truth!

Clemens: You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world

that has baseballs. And those balls have to be hit by men with bats.

Who's gonna do it? You? You, Congressman? I have a greater responsibility

than you can possibly fathom. You weep for steroids and you curse HGH.

You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know:

that HGH, while illegal, probably sells tickets. And my existence, while

grotesque and incomprehensible to you, sells tickets. You don't want

the truth because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties,

you want me on that mound. You need me on that mound. We use words like

fastball, slider, splitfinger...we use these words as the backbone to a

life spent playing something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither

the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and

falls asleep under the blanket of highlights I provide, then questions the

manner in which I provide them! I'd rather you just said thank you, and

went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a bat and dig in.

Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!

Congressman: Did you order the HGH?

Clemens: (quietly) I did the job you sent me to do.

Congressman: Did you order the HGH?

Clemens: You're God damn right I did!!