View New Posts
12
  1. #1

    Default When bank tellers ask you questions....

    what do you say to the bank teller when they ask you about the cheque and where you got it from?

    I just got back from the bank, and the teller was actin' like a freakin detective or something.

  2. #2

    Default

    I'm surprised you even gamble rob. I figured you came on here just to stir up shit to be honest, seeing as how in your first 20 posts you made fun of male pattern baldness, called my mom a porn actress, and said the word "******" twice...

    As far as your question, don't give 'em anymore than you have to. They're instructed in training to ask these questions to detect money laundering and such, and are usually just going through the motions. I generally just give one word answers, and when they can tell I'm not playing around and am in a hurry they tend to move on...

  3. #3

    Default

    BigBollocks you are such a huge help to this forum. I never recieved a check from a sportsbook. Could you give me an example of what type of ???'s they ask??

    Thanks alot

  4. #4

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BigBollocks View Post
    I'm surprised you even gamble rob. I figured you came on here just to stir up shit to be honest, seeing as how in your first 20 posts you made fun of male pattern baldness, called my mom a porn actress, and said the word "******" twice...

    As far as your question, don't give 'em anymore than you have to. They're instructed in training to ask these questions to detect money laundering and such, and are usually just going through the motions. I generally just give one word answers, and when they can tell I'm not playing around and am in a hurry they tend to move on...

    I thought that you were proud of the fact that your mom is a porn actress, or was that your wife? I forget. LOL

    When I lived in NY City, my black girlfriends used to always say I was their "******" and Im a white dude. LOL

  5. #5

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by robzilla View Post
    what do you say to the bank teller when they ask you about the cheque and where you got it from?

    I just got back from the bank, and the teller was actin' like a freakin detective or something.

    What? I flirt with all the tellers at my bank. They usually only ask what time I am picking them up later. What kind of checks are these and what questions do they ask you?

  6. #6

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by curious View Post

    What? I flirt with all the tellers at my bank. They usually only ask what time I am picking them up later. What kind of checks are these and what questions do they ask you?
    It was 1,000 $1.50 cheques from my endorsement deal with nike. every time a commercial comes on i get $1.50.

    What kinda cheques do u think i'm talkin bout? Its the kind that JJ never sees after he gives his cash to the book. lol.

  7. #7

    Default

    PS...i only said ***** once. and that is different than ******.

  8. #8

    Default

    i always deposit my checks at the atm machine at my banks after getting grilled by a fat women bank teller a few months back

    SBR Founder Join Date: 9/20/2005


  9. #9

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by chriscapper View Post
    BigBollocks you are such a huge help to this forum. I never recieved a check from a sportsbook. Could you give me an example of what type of ???'s they ask??

    Thanks alot
    Thanks Chris. As far as questions, they'll just ask you stuff like how do you know this person, why are you sending this amount, what is the money for, etc. They used to train the cashiers at several casinos I worked for to ask the exact same type questions, and would have supervisors watch over to make sure they were asking them.

    It's all government enforcement issues that don't accomplish a damn thing, but make those on the enforcement side feel like they are doing something. I could hang out here until Sunday telling you countless many ways to launder money if you so needed to. Trust me these tellers aren't rocket scientists, they're just going through the motions...

  10. #10

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by robzilla View Post
    PS...i only said ***** once. and that is different than ******.
    I actually thought the JJ thread was pretty damn funny, and was surprised at how some took offense to it. Us baldies are a community as Larry David would say, and we have to stick together and have a sense of humor. GL this weekend Rob...

  11. #11

    Default

    If you get a couple of seconds I'd appreciate knowing the difference between "*****" and "******" for future reference. It'd probably be a thread best started in the private section though...

  12. #12

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BigBollocks View Post
    If you get a couple of seconds I'd appreciate knowing the difference between "*****" and "******" for future reference. It'd probably be a thread best started in the private section though...

    Well, date a black girl and she will call you her "*****". It is a term of affection. At least that is my experience.

  13. #13

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by robzilla View Post
    It was 1,000 $1.50 cheques from my endorsement deal with nike. every time a commercial comes on i get $1.50.

    What kinda cheques do u think i'm talkin bout? Its the kind that JJ never sees after he gives his cash to the book. lol.
    Well, I really don't know which is why I asked. I've never received a check from one of [you know who]. Don't they use an innocuous company name like "Internet Providers of Entertainment While Browsing" or something. I know stupid stuff like that shows up on the credit/DC instead of "Illegal Gambling Emporium".
    Last edited by curious; 11-02-07 at 03:55 PM.

  14. #14

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BigBollocks View Post
    Thanks Chris. As far as questions, they'll just ask you stuff like how do you know this person, why are you sending this amount, what is the money for, etc. They used to train the cashiers at several casinos I worked for to ask the exact same type questions, and would have supervisors watch over to make sure they were asking them.

    It's all government enforcement issues that don't accomplish a damn thing, but make those on the enforcement side feel like they are doing something. I could hang out here until Sunday telling you countless many ways to launder money if you so needed to. Trust me these tellers aren't rocket scientists, they're just going through the motions...
    So what do you say when they ask u how do u know the person....Cant' say they're my bookmaker. I asking these "stupid" questions cause i have a militarty type bank. Thanks.

  15. #15

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by chriscapper View Post
    So what do you say when they ask u how do u know the person....Cant' say they're my bookmaker. I asking these "stupid" questions cause i have a militarty type bank. Thanks.
    ********** asked me that once, the payee was a woman's name, and I said "she is my dominatrix and I am her sex slave and she is sending me money so I can buy sex toys for when she visits me"

  16. #16

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BigBollocks View Post
    I'm surprised you even gamble rob. I figured you came on here just to stir up shit to be honest, seeing as how in your first 20 posts you made fun of male pattern baldness, called my mom a porn actress, and said the word "******" twice...

    As far as your question, don't give 'em anymore than you have to. They're instructed in training to ask these questions to detect money laundering and such, and are usually just going through the motions. I generally just give one word answers, and when they can tell I'm not playing around and am in a hurry they tend to move on...
    FUNNY SHIT.............JUST DEPOSIT THROUGH THE ATM, you never have to see a PERSON

  17. #17

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by curious View Post
    ********** asked me that once, the payee was a woman's name, and I said "she is my dominatrix and I am her sex slave and she is sending me money so I can buy sex toys for when she visits me"
    even more FUNNY SHIT.......i've used the angry approach when I was redepositing before.....(to a customer that looked at my **)(its for a funeral....why dont you mind you own ****ing business!!)

  18. #18

    Default

    anyways, so yeah....****** is a term that the KKK uses for black people. ***** is like buddy to white people. white people "hey buddy!" Black people "what's up my *****!"

  19. #19

    Default

    The ATM is your friend.

    If you insist on using a teller, you tell them anything you want other than "it's a payment from an offshore sportsbook" or "it's my paycheck from Al-Qaeda." Use your imagination.

  20. #20

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by curious View Post

    Well, date a black girl and she will call you her "*****". It is a term of affection. At least that is my experience.
    Date an asian and she'll say, "Me so horny, me love you long time."

  21. #21

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by MrX View Post
    The ATM is your friend.

    If you insist on using a teller, you tell them anything you want other than "it's a payment from an offshore sportsbook" or "it's my paycheck from Al-Qaeda." Use your imagination.
    How bout I got this for letting scientist stick me with needles that have AIDS... sorry for the blood on the cheque... Here you go.

  22. #22

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by robzilla View Post
    Date an asian and she'll say, "Me so horny, me love you long time."
    Date a white girl and she will say "I hate to bring this up now, but we should take care of me first, okay sailor"

  23. #23

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by robzilla View Post
    what do you say to the bank teller when they ask you about the cheque and where you got it from?

    I just got back from the bank, and the teller was actin' like a freakin detective or something.

    Tell them to (in order):

    A) Shut the fukk up.
    B) Cash/deposit the check.
    C) Have a nice day.

  24. #24

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by MrX View Post
    The ATM is your friend.

    If you insist on using a teller, you tell them anything you want other than "it's a payment from an offshore sportsbook" or "it's my paycheck from Al-Qaeda." Use your imagination.
    Yes, they are obviously looking for fake checks and a generic looking check for a large amount looks suspious.... There is no reason to be even close to honest as it is none of their business to began with and you aren't breaking any laws cashing a check... tell them you did consulting work for a brother's small construction company or ran a booth at a state fair that sold sponge mops...

    Besides using ATMs you can also make deposits through the mail at most banks...
    500pts

    SBR WORLD
    POKER CUP
    4th Place 2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/2/2012

    CHARITY DONOR
    11/24/2011 $25 donation

    6,050

    SBR POKER TOP 100

    87th Place 11/1/2011

    SBR Founder Join Date: 9/15/2005


  25. #25
    Scratch's Avatar SBR PRO
    Join Date: 08-19-07
    Posts: 351
    SBR Points: 1251
    Message Me

    Default

    just tell them the check is a return on an investment. they don't need to know any more than that.

  26. #26

    Default

    Here's one for ya.

    Hollywoodsports finally sent me a withhdrawl check in August (after requesting it back in May).
    It was from a bank in Beruit, Lebanon.
    Naturally my bank refused to cash it.
    Guess who was waiting for me out in the parking lot?


  27. #27
    20Four7's Avatar Become A Pro!
    Join Date: 04-08-07
    Posts: 6,496
    SBR Points: 2070
    Message Me

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by sharktank1 View Post
    Here's one for ya.

    Hollywoodsports finally sent me a withhdrawl check in August (after requesting it back in May).
    It was from a bank in Beruit, Lebanon.
    Naturally my bank refused to cash it.
    Guess who was waiting for me out in the parking lot?

    I'm guessing it wasn't bin laden waiting to drive you home.

  28. #28

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by sharktank1 View Post
    Here's one for ya.

    Hollywoodsports finally sent me a withhdrawl check in August (after requesting it back in May).
    It was from a bank in Beruit, Lebanon.
    Naturally my bank refused to cash it.
    Guess who was waiting for me out in the parking lot?

    Did u have to lift and spread em?

  29. #29

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by curious View Post
    ********** asked me that once, the payee was a woman's name, and I said "she is my dominatrix and I am her sex slave and she is sending me money so I can buy sex toys for when she visits me"
    Excellent

    Now I'll be prepared next time

  30. #30

  31. #31

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Cheryl View Post
    Too Funny!
    But it is true.

  32. #32

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by the2ofspades View Post
    i'm just glad i don't those problems, canada rocks
    dude, im from canada. when ur cheques get big, youll get questions.

  33. #33

    Default

    Has anyone every tried to cash them at those check advance places? Was thinkin maybe that would be as edgy..

  34. #34

    Default

    Just tell the teller it is none of their business and deposit the check. If it is drawn in US funds and made out to you, they have no reason to question it. If there was an issue with it, it would be flagged by a backroom department, not a teller.

    SBR Founder Join Date: 9/14/2005


  35. #35

    Default

    well...if the checks come from nevada I tell them it's a payment from the whore house I own...if it's a check from a foreign country I tell them it's from an international whore house I own...seems to work...

12 Last
Top