View New Posts
  1. #1

    Default What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods?

    Santa Claus stops at HO HO HO

  2. #2

    Default

    I don't get it. A single woman who sleeps with a married man is a ho but a single man who sleeps with a married woman is a stud?

  3. #3

  4. #4

  5. #5

    Default

    someone watched Jay Leno last night!
    90pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY10th Place 5/28/2012

    115pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY8th Place 5/25/2012

    325pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY2nd Place 5/15/2012

    1180pts

    TOP SPORTSBOOK
    WINNER
    05/05/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/11/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/2/2012


  6. #6

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by big joe 1212 View Post
    someone watched Jay Leno last night!
    Is there where it was? One of the guys told it in the office, made me chuckle.

  7. #7

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by pavyracer View Post
    I don't get it. A single woman who sleeps with a married man is a ho but a single man who sleeps with a married woman is a stud?
    welcome to this unjust crazy double standard World Pav. It's good to see you're in touch with your feminine side

  8. #8

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by DwightShrute View Post
    Is there where it was? One of the guys told it in the office, made me chuckle.
    90pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY10th Place 5/28/2012

    115pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY8th Place 5/25/2012

    325pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY2nd Place 5/15/2012

    1180pts

    TOP SPORTSBOOK
    WINNER
    05/05/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/11/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/2/2012


  9. #9

    Default

    I've been using it myself!
    90pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY10th Place 5/28/2012

    115pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY8th Place 5/25/2012

    325pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY2nd Place 5/15/2012

    1180pts

    TOP SPORTSBOOK
    WINNER
    05/05/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/11/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/2/2012


  10. #10

    Default

    A blonde was shopping at Target and came across a shiny silver
    Thermos. She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and took
    it to the clerk to ask what it was.

    The clerk said, 'Why, that's a thermos..... It keeps hot things hot,
    And cold things cold.'

    'Wow, said the blonde, 'that's amazing....I'm going to buy it!' So she
    bought the thermos and took it to work the next day.

    Her boss saw it on her desk. 'What's that,' he asked?

    'Why, that's a thermos.....

    It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold,' she replied..

    Her boss inquired, 'What do you have in it?'

    The blond replied..... ...'Two popsicles and some coffee.'

  11. #11

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by big joe 1212 View Post
    someone watched Jay Leno last night!
    very astute on your part. didnt' want to say anything, but that's where he stole....... sorry, i mean..that's where he got the joke..

  12. #12

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Nicky Santoro View Post
    very astute on your part. didnt' want to say anything, but that's where he stole....... sorry, i mean..that's where he got the joke..
    really eh? Still on that?

  13. #13

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Nicky Santoro View Post
    very astute on your part. didnt' want to say anything, but that's where he stole....... sorry, i mean..that's where he got the joke..
    i know a lot of people re-use jokes, so he could have gotten it anywhere! I'm guilty myself of using it! All jokes come from somewhere!
    90pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY10th Place 5/28/2012

    115pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY8th Place 5/25/2012

    325pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY2nd Place 5/15/2012

    1180pts

    TOP SPORTSBOOK
    WINNER
    05/05/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/11/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/2/2012


  14. #14

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by DwightShrute View Post
    A blonde was shopping at Target and came across a shiny silver
    Thermos. She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and took
    it to the clerk to ask what it was.

    The clerk said, 'Why, that's a thermos..... It keeps hot things hot,
    And cold things cold.'

    'Wow, said the blonde, 'that's amazing....I'm going to buy it!' So she
    bought the thermos and took it to work the next day.

    Her boss saw it on her desk. 'What's that,' he asked?

    'Why, that's a thermos.....

    It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold,' she replied..

    Her boss inquired, 'What do you have in it?'

    The blond replied..... ...'Two popsicles and some coffee.'
    I will use it!
    90pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY10th Place 5/28/2012

    115pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY8th Place 5/25/2012

    325pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY2nd Place 5/15/2012

    1180pts

    TOP SPORTSBOOK
    WINNER
    05/05/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/11/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/2/2012


  15. #15

    Default

    Did you hear about the two blondes who froze to death in a drive-in movie?

    They had gone to see 'Closed for the Winter.'

  16. #16

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by DwightShrute View Post
    Did you hear about the two blondes who froze to death in a drive-in movie?

    They had gone to see 'Closed for the Winter.'
    90pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY10th Place 5/28/2012

    115pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY8th Place 5/25/2012

    325pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY2nd Place 5/15/2012

    1180pts

    TOP SPORTSBOOK
    WINNER
    05/05/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/11/2012

    400pts

    SBR POKER TOURNEY1st Place 5/2/2012


  17. #17

    Default

    I Just went to the store to buy the new 'Grand theft Auto' game for my XBOX, I had to describe the game to the new sales assistant. ''It's about a man who drives round shagging whores, uses violence involving metal bars, crashes his car and evades the police....... Stupid bitch gave me Tiger Woods PGA Tour 10.

  18. #18

  19. #19

    Default

    It is near the Christmas break of the school year. The students have turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do. All the children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early dismissal.

    Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly can leave early today."

    Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question."

    Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"

    Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."

    Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."

    Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.

    Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"

    Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."

    Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."

    Johnny is even madder than before.

    Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"

    Before Johnny can open his mouth,
    Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."

    Teacher: "That's right
    Nancy , you may also leave."

    Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer to any of the questions.

    When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut!"

    The teacher turns around: "
    NOW WHO SAID THAT?"

    Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO
    NOW?"

  20. #20

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by DwightShrute View Post
    It is near the Christmas break of the school year. The students have turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do. All the children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early dismissal.

    Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly can leave early today."

    Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question."

    Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"

    Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."

    Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."

    Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.

    Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"

    Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."

    Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."

    Johnny is even madder than before.

    Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"

    Before Johnny can open his mouth,
    Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."

    Teacher: "That's right
    Nancy , you may also leave."

    Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer to any of the questions.

    When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut!"

    The teacher turns around: "
    NOW WHO SAID THAT?"

    Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO
    NOW?"

  21. #21

  22. #22

    Default

    Dwight has a propensity to steal written and oral material. He is famous for stealing
    political garbage on that forum. Glad to see he is only stealing jokes now.

    SBR Founder Join Date: 10/31/2005


  23. #23

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by dante1 View Post
    Dwight has a propensity to steal written and oral material. He is famous for stealing
    political garbage on that forum. Glad to see he is only stealing jokes now.
    well said you call it stealing but I just pass on a joke to bring a laugh to someone while you stare at the computer, in a dark basement, mad at the world because you weren't blessed with reason or common sense.

    have a great Christmas and I wish you and your family the very best this holiday season.


  24. #24

    Default

    What do Tiger Woods and baby fur seals have in common?

    They've both been clubbed by Norwegians!

  25. #25

  26. #26

Top