[Dave]

The Money Pit - 'We drew your name from a hat, we work today!

National Lampoons Vacation - 'Thats a bee-bee gun, that wont even break the skin'. 'Yes it will, it will break the skin, AND give a VERY BAD infection'

History of the World Part 1 - 'It's good to be the king!'

[bigboydan]

History of the World Part 1 - 'It's good to be the king!'

i haven't seen that movie in years. theres one line in that movie that stuck out to me after reading your post though. and thats when the actor kept saying "oh piss boy"

[picantel]

I always get cracked up by 'is that an african or a european swallow"

[picantel]

my marriage?

[Max Levine]

Ace Ventura: "If I'm not back in 5 minutes, wait longer."

[Dave]

whats this from?


HOW MUCH ASS DO I HAVE TO KISS AROUND HERE TO MAKE PARTNER?

Jim Carrey, Liar Liar



Other ones I enjoyed -

Caddy Shack - "Well don't just stand there GET SOME GLUE!"

and

"Hey, you scratched my anchor!"

[pags11]

"So you're saying there's a chance?!"- Lloyd Christmas, Dumb and Dumber...

[Max Levine]

One I love from Liar, Liar:

'Do you like my new dress?'
'Whatever takes the focus off your head.'

[Relentless]

People call me the Bry man; I'm the stylish one of the group. I know what you're asking yourself and the answer is yes. I have a nick name for my penis. Its called the Octagon, but I also nick named my testes - my left one is James Westfall and my right one is Doctor Kenneth Noisewater. You ladies play your cards right you just might get to meet the whole gang. - Anchorman

[Dave]

Dumb and Dumber is a classic - "Just when I think you couldnt be any more stupid, you go and do something to totally redeem yourself!"

how about theres something about Mary - "Well how did you get the frank above the beans?" "Franks and Beans, franks and beans" ... "We got a BLEEDER!!"

[Dead Money]

Not exactly a one liner but some of the shit from the Austin Powers movies rule.



DR Evil:
The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.

[Dave]

Smokey and the Bandit - "Jr." "Yes Daddy?" "Remind me when I get home to punch your momma in the mouth"

[bigboydan]

heres one for you dave, this ones from fast times at ridgemount high:

"you know, i'm been thinking about this Mr.Hand... if i'm here and, your hear. doesn't that make it our time"

[Dave]

Vacation - "You left his dead mother strapped to a lawn chair in the back yard, I am sure he won't mind... I hope you kids have learned something about life and death." "Yea, don't die unless someone is home"

[bigboydan]

heres one from stripes:

my name is francis soyer, but everyone calls me physco. if i hear any one of you guys all me francis, i'll kill ya....ewwwww.... you just made the list buddy. i don't want any of you homos touching my stuff either. if i find out any of you homos touched my stuff, i'll kill ya. then,sgt. hulka says... lighten up francis.